The Relationship Question
I have a dilemma. I’ve been dating my boyfriend for over a year, known him for a while. I’m head over heels basically. A few days ago, after bringing up a future which we’ve talked about before, he ignores me for a while and tells me we should break up. He doesn’t want kids, ever. I want to have children and this topic seems to split us right down the middle. I told him I never wanted kids and I’d settle for that…but I feel depressed…I’m young, I know…but should I just deal with this?
The Relationship Advice
Thank you for sharing your situation. It’s not uncommon for people to disagree on important issues in a relationship. You might find it helpful to ask yourself a few questions to clarify what you want to do:
- What do I really want in life?
- What is positive about my current relationship and what is negative?
- What can I do to improve the situation?
- What can I do to make sure my point of view is heard?
- What kind of person do I see myself with in the long run?
- What issues are a deal breaker for me?
- What do I need in a relationship?
Once you do some careful thinking about questions like these you can talk calmly and kindly with your boyfriend. Make sure you each listen to one another without reacting or getting upset. The idea is to tell him what’s important to you and get an idea what he’s thinking so you can make a decision for yourself.
It will be up to you to decide if this is the type of relationship you’re looking for. Remember that you both deserve to be in a relationship that fits your needs.